Adventures Jumping Over Hurdles

I hope this post isn't too DebbieDowner. Today was a really rough day all around. The crap just never seemed to stop. Each thing on it's own may have been manageable, but it was just one of those days. Meltdowns so epic we needed to remove ourselves from public space (twice), non-stop sibling bickering that eventually led to a physical scuffle (complete with bruises), Having to tell my 9 year old that, yes I realize it's beyond unfair, but we won't be able to afford for you to play basketball this summer, or really do anything that costs more than a few dollars. It was one of those days. But the icing on the cake had to have been my stupid window.

About a month ago, I had my inspection. It went better than I could have expected; my licence said my space looked great, organized and she was very impressed. There were just a few things here and there that needed to be corrected, like things that weren't posted or corrections to my parent policies. I was really confident, until she went into my playroom and measured the window. The length of the opening was too small. By a whole four inches. She told me my options were change the window or don't use the room. I decided to change the window, as the room is basically the hub of the entire daycare. It was pricey, as the size of the window dictated that the replacement had to be custom made. And being custom made, it also took about three weeks. But it came today, and when I saw it installed, I realized it was the perfect size length wise, but way too small width wise. I just wanted to collapse. All the time and money, seemed to just be completely wasted.

I think I've come up with a few solutions, but it was just the shock of putting in so much time and money into something that is basically useless. And right now, at a time when we have to account for every penny, I felt like such a fool spending so much money on something that I can't use. 

It's also is coming up on my husband's one year anniversary of being unemployed; not exactly an anniversary we want to celebrate with cake. As it's gotten closer and closer, the tension keeps growing. I can tell that it's really affecting his self-esteem being out of work for so long; he feels less and less confident with every job application that gets rejected. Right now he has a few leads, and I really hope they pan out, because being unemployed is really starting to take it's toll on everyone. When I get this window debacle sorted out I can start making some money too, which will take some of the pressure off Steven, but I know it's more than about money for him.

Hopefully Summer when things pan out for us.